Resistance to recognizing this enneatype -stumped until I saw how nostalgic for, and focused on, the good health I used to take for granted. Pursuing/pining for it-- comparing. Every minute I spend attending those thoughts is one I’m prevented from receiving and enjoying what’s in front of me. R/L.
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You got it. That’s the con, isn’t it? The process of pining you’re describing is much like a process of guilt or regret. It’s a story in conditioned mind. It serves no purpose other than making a person feel bad and out of the present. That’s it. Nothing can be done. There are no action steps! Going over it one more time is not going to change a thing. But it does keep us stuck in suffering, doesn’t it? Gassho
Longing for something "missing", seeking "perfection" and romanticising the past are big karmic patterns for me. Practice has assisted enormously in seeing this how this process precludes presence and therefore the joy/ deep connection that I seek. Currently playing out in "need" to find perfect home. So good to catch! R/L
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That insight is essential for all of us to “get.” The process of focusing on what’s missing prevents us from having the very experience—the joy/deep connection we seek—that we would have if we were HERE rather than being fooled into believing it’s missing and we need to “go get it.” A really great catch! Gassho
"Something is missing" signals that I'm superior, and being happy signals I'm like everybody else, according to egocentrickarmicconditioning. Being aware of this allows everything that IS here to manifest. World opens and is spacious with possibility. R/L
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That is horrifying, isn’t it? If anyone wonders if egocentric karmic conditioning/self-hate truly is rotten, there’s some compelling evidence. For the person who doesn’t see that scam, being happy would be something to avoid! Good grief. As you’re pointing out, ego will do anything to get attention, and an unhappy person will give more attention to ego. Thanks for that. Gassho
My 4 theme is; “I can’t get a break”. Egocentrickarmicconditioning/self-hate adds things up for me and I always come up short. I get bewildered and outraged; “Why me?”. I can be aware of the bamboozle as it is happening and it still zings me. Very dramatic! Gassho
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Being aware of the bamboozle as it’s happening and still getting zinged is actually a very good place to be. What that says is that you’re watching the whole thing from awareness. That’s a powerful place in practice. You’re not so identified with ego or with the person being tortured that you don’t know it’s happening. As you continue to watch, you’ll recognize what’s coming, and the zing will no longer be a zinger. At that point you can yell “Gotcha” and get all the energy back for you! Gassho
Always looking at and lamenting the gap between what could be and what is. Seeing process a dozen times a day; resulting melancholy has a comfortable familiarity. Hard to imagine being without it. R/L
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Well, the good news is that we can suffer for just as long as we want to. Gassho
I see the romantic process in my love life. There's a great relationship out there other than my current one. It causes suffering and when I Focus on love in the moment and details that "annoy" me fade.
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This is a great case for being HERE rather than following suffering stories around in the head, isn’t it? Can you see that “being somewhere else” process in what you sent in? Gassho
Deep inside I do feel defective and an imposter, especially in the world of work, hoping not to be exposed as such. Spend time looking externally for a father-figure, an unconditionally supportive and wise guide. Oh, the mentor! R/L
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You think? Sounds as if you’ve been around awareness practice long enough to know that those “defective and an imposter” feelings are not “deep inside.” Those feelings are as deep inside as a conversation in conditioned mind. As soon as you drop that conversation, those feelings will disappear. “Defective” and “imposter” are thoughts, not feelings. They’re labels. What causes what you’re feeling is the sensations in your body produced by that conversation. With me? Gassho
Poster girl for Fours here! Freedom in knowing the "missing" story is a lie. Spent 27 years in therapy and 20 years in Practice trying to heal "flaws" so I could be fulfilled (happy). New Practice path: to have and receive what is here but ego said was missing. R/L
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Excellent! Now you’re practicing, huh? It’s a miracle, isn’t it? Looking, looking, looking, following around a voice that says “not that,” and then in a moment we see! Everything we’ve been seeking has been right here—inside!—all along! We are truly blessed. Gassho
The 4 pattern in me came online in my teens when I first sensed the emptiness, longing inside me. I focused this longing on God and it has been driving me since. Wouldn't God want me to feel whole now? To be happy now? To stop running? R/L
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The question is, do you want that? If you want to feel whole, to be happy, to stop running, you certainly can. It’s not up to “God,” it’s up to you. Awareness practice can give you the “how,” but the “want to” is what you need to bring. Gassho
Even though I mostly define myself as happily single, the 4 in me has spent my whole life (partnered or single, mostly single), yearning for the partner who will really get me and complete me. Yet, my daily routines are so complex, there is not even room for any partner.
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Do you get you? What stops you from “completing” you? What would “completing” you look like? What does that even mean? Do you know? Gassho
I see 4 process in romantic relationships. Appreciate ˜unique’ identity because I don’t desire a partner. Pattern of having crush, becoming closer and then lose interest. With R/L see trap: being in a conversation/process of judging and distancing from others, i.e. Life. Encouragement to practice simply being present, without conversation.
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Umm… very good! Drop that conversation and see what happens. So many people are afraid to drop the ego because “who would I be?” Time to find out, huh? Gassho