CLASS 4 FINAL
I've associated certain sensations with the qualities of 4: ""butterflies in the stomach"" mean there is something wrong with the moment. I need to pursue something¦ else. The sensation reminds me to get out of the head and be here. R/L
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It’s very helpful, isn’t it, to be able to turn signals of “something wrong” into signals of “time to get HERE.” This is one very clear way to see there really is nothing wrong. Even conditioned messages of “something wrong” will bring us back to thisherenow. It’s all working for our good! Gassho
As a Four, found an instant shift to gratitude place from a Four place (through R/L). Was amazed how gratitude is just here. I experience generosity (feelings) internally. Yet conditioning is telling me that the reality of the situation is going to the opposite way (lack/4). R/L
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I know! Isn’t that fascinating? You’re having the experience of gratitude and generosity as the voices of egocentric karmic conditioning/self-hate are lying to you! Easy to see why folks who want to end suffering pound so hard on that drum of “gotta get out of the conversation in conditioned mind,” huh? Gassho
Really relate to the push-pull pattern. After a few trips on that merry-go-round, it feels preferable to just stay in the daydream/fantasy; sidestep disappointing realities. But avoiding the lows means avoiding the highs too. Cravings for intensity/aliveness push ego to re-board for another merry-go-round push-pull cycle. R/L
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Au contraire! Ego is always eager to re-board for another merry-go-round push-pull cycle. Ego talks you into “sidestepping disappointing realities,” which translates into ego is your only full-time intimate relationship, and when that ceases to produce the juice ego needs, you’re encouraged to get onboard again. Do that until the juice ceases and retreat. You may think, because you’re being told, that you have an intimate relationship with another human being, but that one is finishing a poor second to the primary one with ego. Gassho
Seeing that longing/desiring is "what you practice is what you have". If I’m practicing desiring, what I'll have is desiring, not fulfillment or happiness or love. We are also distracted from questioning original premise, ”I'm defective”, which is the source, it seems, of desiring something other than presence. R/L
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That would be a very large B I N G O! Yes, indeed, give attention to desiring, practice desiring, and desiring is what you have. Period. And, yes, again, that whole process is meant to keep you from noticing it’s based on a foundation of hooey. Are you defective? NOT A CHANCE! Gassho
I grew up believing I was ”special.” I waited for special things to happen to/for me. I hoped someone, something would recognize it and celebrate ”me.” This kept me focused on the external, and unable to experience Life uniquely expressing itself through me, well, until now! R/L lots!
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Now you get to realize you’ve been right all along—you are special. You just didn’t know until quite recently that you are the “someone” who would recognize and celebrate “you.” It’s the best, isn’t it? Only you will ever know what is a perfect celebration for you. You can be open to others realizing how special you are, but they won’t be burdened with trying to convince you how special you are. You already know! Gassho
I’m participating by writing in even though, unlike with Types 1-3, I haven’t yet been able to see how the Romantic shows up in me. Hmm, perhaps a tip-off that I have a blind spot, and that it would be good to continue looking? Will do! Gassho
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Oooohhh, very good! That is the spirit of inquiry that produces enlightening results! (You do R/L, don’t you?) Gassho
The trap of longing, but can’t have.”Different/ unloveable”. Bought it for a lifetime! This story wrapped it’s tentacles very early on. What a waste of time. Seeing it helps, but it feels like a long journey out. Re-directing attention to the mentor, one step a time. R/L.
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Nay, nay! It’s not a “long journey out.” You’re already out! You’ve seen it. Now you get to practice enjoying it! That “long journey out” crapola is ego’s desperate attempt to keep you looking to it to see how you’re doing. Don’t do that! Look to the Mentor for the confirmation that you’re where you’ve wanted to be—HERE. Gassho
Voice: where is my guru? If I were really worthy one would appear to guide me. I just need to work harder, be smarter, meditate more. Like Dharma. Other people have it drop from the sky but I have to work to make it happen and then continually question it.
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Here’s a big hint for you: Ego doesn’t WANT a guru, and that’s what’s been doing the looking! Do you know what codswallop is? What you wrote is a load of that. Drop that “poor me” song and dance, start practicing, and who knows what might drop in. Gassho
I'm a died-in-the-wool 4. 4-ness has kept me chasing the most perfect meaningful experience, romance, religion, environment, culture, etcetera for as long as I can remember. It has exhausted my resources. Finding stillness in exhaustion and in not believing there's anyplace better than here.
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There is, in fact, no place like HERE. But most people won’t accept that until exhausting all other options. It’s just how we are! Perhaps that’s so we’ll be ready to let go and relax into thisherenow when we finally arrive? Gassho
By growing up in abandonment and deprivation, someone or something was always missing. Other families had it and ego says that "they" still do. Gratitude brings me back to here that life is abundant and my husband, kids, and I are safe. It's good enough. R/L.
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In fact, it’s GREAT, isn’t it? I’m guessing you’re able to see at this juncture that “they” don’t “have” anything you don’t have, and actually most have a lot less. You know you are living in abundance. You have a family you love, and you’re all safe and well. You kind of “have it all,” don’t you? Time for a heartfelt “THANK YOU,” yes? Gassho